“Gosh, I can’t believe this place,” the lady in front of me in line said as we stood in line. She had one hand on her shoulder, holding her pocketbook in place. Her other elbow was resting on her hip, holding her cell phone in view. Her thumb was set on scroll.
She peered over her cell phone to watch the counter where we were eagerly awaiting our turn in line at the pharmacy. A woman in front had lost her prescription and the attendants were desperately trying to help her remember where it might have been placed.
With a heavy sigh and a monster eye roll, the lady in front of me went back to her phone and began to scroll.
“So, these pills we are going to get will make me be good, right mom?” The boy in front of me asked his mom.
“Hmm?” she answered and switched from Instagram to text.
“These pills are going to help me be good, right?”
“What? Um, no. These pills are going to help you with your attention. So you can listen better at school. I want to give you one as soon as we get them and see what happens.”
“Oh,” the boy returned and stared at the line ahead.
I looked over at Declan. His head was on the chair. A bit of drool was coming out of the side of his mouth. Just a few hours earlier he had mentioned his ear hurt. I knew it must be bad for him to bring it up. Declan is not one to feel much pain, let alone tell me about it. So, I packed him in the car and one quick trip to the Dr. led to the quick diagnosis of: double ear infection.
While we stood and waited, I marveled at how fast the woman in front of me texted. Thumbs ablaze, she flew across her phone’s keypad. I am more of a plucker myself. Right pointer finger pointing trying to find the next letter I want. One. Letter. Slowly. At. A. Time.
This lady was texting an equally capable texter. Their conversation flowed as if they were talking on the phone.
“Next!” The cashier called and the lady in front of me took her step forward.
She gave her name, the prescription was located and scanned.
The texter went on texting.
The cashier was asking a question to the lady.
“Hmm? What?” the lady asked looking up from her phone for an instant.
“Mom, you’ve got to hit the green button on the key pad.” The little boy offered.
“AN-THO-NY STOP IT. I am BUSY!!” The woman said to the boy. She turned her head and asked the cashier again, “I’m sorry, what?”
“If you don’t have any questions for the pharmacist, please hit the green button on the key pad.”
“Oh, okay,” The woman answered, pressed the button and began to restart her text conversation. Her receipt was printed, her bag was handed over and out she went, still texting, with Anthony in tow.
A few years ago, Bobby asked me what “irony” was. I found myself reciting lines from the Alanis Morissette song “Ironic” to try to describe irony, only realizing I wasn’t describing irony at all. I only left a small boy utterly confused.
I saw irony at the pharmacy. I saw a mother hoping to help her son with his attention while failing to attend to the task that was before her.
I have no idea what she was texting about – could have been very important. And Anthony very well may need support in the classroom. This situation at face value just appeared – ironic.
I could go on about cell phones. When I think back, I believe I got my first cell phone when I was 30. My first smart phone didn’t arrive until I was 36, probably. Now I look back and long for the days where they didn’t exist. Where we interacted with each other in the here and now.
But as an autism parent, I am thankful for my smart phone. I hand it over to Declan and can watch Bobby or Catelyn play sports. Standing in lines, waiting rooms, stores, etc. Me bad mouthing smart phones would be, you know, a little too ironic.
“Yeah, I really do think….”
We didn’t even have a phone in the house, and had to go to a public phone box.
Wow, that is something!
I began singing soon as I saw the title too! It’s just one of those songs that you end up humming for days, occasionally belting out the chorus, of course 😁
Anyway, I didn’t need the title to see where you were going with the story about the preoccupied mom and Anthony “the boy with the attention problem”. Funny, how Anthony had greater grasp of his surrounding than his mother.
Actually, no, I don’t think it’s funny. I think the mom herself should pop a couple of those pills she got for her son 😠
While I fully respect a parent’s need to retain their identity outside the sphere of their children and, yes, the texts could have been on some serious issue, I think when you are with your kid, you should at least treat the child with respect, if not your undivided attention. Also, she should have apologized to her son for reprimanding him for pointing out the green-button thing when she found out he was right. Being distracted is perfectly normal in a parent, but assuming such a self-important stance is completely unnecessary.
Yes, I agree. I advocate for being present in the here and now, and not off in cyber land. I have mental rules when the phone is allowed to be out (for myself). I don’t want to be a role model for my kids that demonstrates a greater connection with social media than with them. And you’re right, treat them with respect!
Fun trivia fact… Alanis Morrisette is a Highly Sensitive Person.
Definitely a case of irony there in the pharmacy line.
I get frustrated with people who can’t seem to put down their phones. Although, like you, I have been glad to be able to give it to Ben. Thank you YouTube.
Poor Declan 😷😟 it’s great that he was able to tell you. We never know Ben has an ear infection until his eardrum bursts and starts draining.
Ouch! That is a serious ear infection. Yeah, Declan was just grabbing at his ear and said “It hurts!” Which is pretty clear. Sometimes I have to decipher the issue – like when he has a sore throat he says, “my breath is hot.” I am thankful he can get those messages to me. Yeah – phone lady painted a big picture for me as I stood behind her. And as much as I would love for smart phones to just disappear on any given day (or be less of a factor in our daily ilves) I do appreciate being able to hand it to Declan to help get us through different events. Alanis is, huh? I knew we had a lot in common 😉
Ah yes, lines at the pharmacy. That’s an aspect of city living I don’t miss. I’ve just gotten my first smart phone (age 55) and I’m learning how to text. I’m actually approaching it as I would a typing class. I only use my thumbs, I try to use each thumb equally and I aim for speed. My goal is to make what I consider the most ridiculous form of communication go as smoothly as possible.
I thought the phone would be extremely distracting but it hasn’t been so far. I’ve kept social media off of it and minimized the number of “alerts” it sends me to only phone calls and texts. The thing I like most is that I can read blogs while sitting in my car waiting for my kids to finish whatever they’re doing.
I’ve recently learned how to do voice to text – helps me get a legible, kind of on point message out pretty quickly. At least faster than my plucking. You know, I don’t have WordPress on my phone. The main screens are just kids games. I don’t put social media on it either because I don’t want the apps to suck up space. But WordPress would be something I could use.
Have refused to get a smart phone! Like my stupid phone too much. It makes and receives calls, isn’t that the whole point? To purchase a phone that is smarter than I am is way too frightening for me! Kinda like the fear of robots over taking the Earth.
Exactly! They were supposed to be something to be used to make calls – or in case there was an emergency. I agree – reminds of Maximun Overdrive by Stephen King where the machines take over the earth!
I know the post is focused on something else but Anthony asking if the pills would make him be good broke my heart a little. Not anti-meds, I don’t have the luxury to be that but for a child to internalize his difficulties and ask that is hard for me to even listen to. Imagine how he feels.
We’re a bit tech ambivalent here: have to use it for work a lot if I have to have a flexi-career to accommodate life choices, have done a dissertation on the use of technology to help kids on the autism spectrum learn concepts, do advocate very conservative time slots and my kids used to get gadgets one hour a week. Now, they’ve forgotten to ask, despite our having ipads for me to work with my kids who come for therapy. I work out of home, so it is there.
I kinda hate my phone. Not its fault, got too many PTM calls and have close to diagnosable PTSD when I see it ringing from school numbers, even now, when my son is homeschooled! Need it though, from taxi services to daughter’s school groups, whether I like it or not. I get what you are saying.
Yes, me too. Felt bad for Anthony. He seemed like he wanted to please and would try the pills if it was going to help. I feel we are a little over teched, here. And I guess I have a low tolerance for it being so prevelant, everywhere we go. But I agree – My oldest has a phone so he can get in touch with us if he needs us, since he is in to so many activities and away from home a lot. And to communicate with others the same way – driving others for after school activites. I guess they are here to stay. A necessary evil!