“So, a little while ago we had a retired teacher come into the classroom to teach us all a new way to work through math. I had my notepad and was sitting in the back of classroom taking notes. And I kept looking at Declan.”
“What was he doing?” I asked Declan’s teacher.
“He was actively not listening. He was fidgeting, not looking at her, playing with pencils….”
“Oh no!” I replied.
“Yeah, so I encouraged him, ‘Hey Declan, listen to the teacher, okay?’ and he got really mad. He told me, ‘She’s not my teacher – you are!’”
“Oh no!”
“Yeah, substitutes are tough on Declan. It’s a stranger and he hates the change. I know that he is working on that in his social skills meetings and I will continue to let you know when I won’t be here so you can prep him. We have to keep our eye on this.”
“My gosh, yes. He is going to have a new teacher next year too. He’s got to be ready to learn from someone else.”
We both nodded our heads and continued our meeting.
On any given day, Declan cries about going to school. Doesn’t happen every day these days, but at least once a week there are tears for the day ahead.
This week is exceptionally hard on him. His teacher is away at a conference and he is with a substitute teacher – all week long.
Declan has been kind of spoiled in terms of teachers. He had the same special education preschool teacher for three years. Then he was able to maintain the same kindergarten teacher for first grade. Dealing with new teachers is not something he has had to do.
Until the substitute comes along.
His problem? Things are different. There are things his teacher allows him to do that the substitute does not. I don’t know all the little things he is crying about that are different. When I ask, I get an astounding, “I DON’T WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT!”
I do know that he talks about this often in his social skills groups. All kinds of papers lik this one:
![20190321_093249[1]](https://i0.wp.com/www.autismfamilypower.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/03/20190321_0932491.jpg?resize=576%2C1024&ssl=1)
And this one come home so that I know how to prepare Declan for the substitute teacher:
Today was a day of tears, Declan begging to be allowed to stay home sick. To not have to deal with the substitute and all the things that are different.
Thankfully, today is a special day and at the last minute I was able to get him excited for Rock your Socks day – World Down Syndrome Day.
What is Rock your Socks?
These are chromosomes.
![54255713_10156634309967740_9060365628400992256_n[1]](https://i0.wp.com/www.autismfamilypower.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/03/54255713_10156634309967740_9060365628400992256_n1.jpg?resize=217%2C300&ssl=1)
The one circled is chromosome 21 – note the three copies of the chromosome. This is Trisomy 21, also known as Down syndrome. You and I have just two copies of Chromosome 21. People with Down syndrome have 3 copies.
They look like socks, right? This is where the idea of Rock your Socks for World Down Syndrome Day was born from… simple!
On March 21st, World Down Syndrome Day, we celebrate and raise awareness by wearing our brightest, loudest socks.
And why is WDSD held on March 21st? 21:3 (chromosome 21, 3 copies = 21st day of 3rd month of the year) easy to remember!
![20190321_083312[1]](https://i0.wp.com/www.autismfamilypower.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/03/20190321_0833121.jpg?resize=169%2C300&ssl=1)
So, with a smile I got Declan into his socks, out the door and with light whimpering, onto the bus. I encouraged him to take breaks and walks with his aid. To get used to substitute teachers. And to share in the fun of celebrating World Down Syndrome Day with his peers who are all rocking their socks on this special day!
I used to play with a Down Syndrome child… a neighbor’s kid. He was born about the time my kids were and he, my boys and his sister would do the Easter egg hunts, Halloween and popsicles together. He was kind of ham-handed, early on, but then the other kids all developed faster so he was suddenly the small one.
He’d invent the games we’d play. He might hit his hand on the door, then I’d hit mine on the door… he’d rap twice… etc. I’ve seen him on Facebook (my son’s page) and, even though he’s a teen, he looks very much the same…
But, after my wife and I separated, she got custody of all of our friends…
He sounds like a very special boy. Sounds like play time was a lot of fun. 🙂 I am sorry she got custody of the friends 🙁
Deflecting attention can be such a useful tool. Well done, Robyn. I hope Declan had a great day with his loud socks and his substitute teacher. He looks so cool! 🙂
Thank you so much!
Those are cool socks. I love the way you navigated through that. People under estimate the impact a change in teacher or routine can have.
Thank you! Yes, I agree – it’s a very big change for our sensitive guys. I have one more day to be creative – to get him I guess not excited, but at least content to go. Fingers crossed I come up with something good!