I zippered my coat, grabbed my purse, swiped the keys from the front table, and opened the front door.
Bob and Bobby were in the middle of a one-on-one basketball game that appeared to be extremely competitive. The older of the two still mentally battling his age, refusing to concede without a proper fight.
Declan was sitting in the backseat of the car. Wearing his oversized poufy jacket, hood around his head, seat belt already buckled across his chest. Declan sat waiting, patiently looking out the window towards the sky above.
Bob stopped bouncing the ball, held it for a second, and asked, “How many more stores are you going to take him to?”
“I have no idea,” I answered and shrugged, taking my position in the driver’s seat and prepared for our journey.
The FIDGETS.
When Declan becomes interested in a new topic, he becomes FIXATED on a new topic.
Generally, we are very accommodating to his new area of interest and hyper-focus.
There was that time when we all had to watch the YouTube video (100 times) where a dad made his son a cardboard tent. Eventually, we had to make one too. Unfortunately for Molly, her dog bed had to be removed for the “tent” to fit anywhere inside.
Then there was the giant robot invention. This was not his first attempt. For about a week, all you heard was the aluminum foil being unraveled – and I mean ALL the aluminum foil. But it kept him busy and happy at the same time. Fine.
Then there was the week Declan walked around the house as a doctor wearing goggles, gloves, and a mask wondering about each of our ailments. I believe we all continued to point him to a different family member. I know I did, especially when I saw his “office” sign on the door to the garage.
Then, we landed on fidgets. Fidget videos times a million. Fidgets became THE infatuation.
Since I bought some for him at the beginning of the school year, Declan already had a handful to start a collection. But YouTube videos showed him more. They were even kind of enough to tell him where to buy them.
That is when all the driving began. This Walgreens, that Learning Express. The stores were laid out to him in the videos. We traveled to the stores outlined, yet they were fidget free. I will give Declan credit – we didn’t just start buying random things. He had his eye on certain items, and if the store did not have what he wanted, we left without buying anything.
BUT since Declan is a smart cookie, he began to Google OTHER locations of the same stores farther away. He knew what time the stores opened; he knew what time they closed. Whole mornings or evenings were dedicated to driving to these stores for Declan to search out new items to add to his collection.
Which is how I found myself driving an hour away to search another store that MIGHT have the fidgets Declan wanted so badly. Thankfully, this store had them all.
We were there for five minutes – that was all the time he needed. Five minutes where Declan squeaked in pleasure, moving from one “As seen on TikTok!” display to another. Every item was located and added to his collection.
I am also happy that Declan found ways to make fidgets on his own. All it took from me was a bag of balloons.
He filled one with flour, one with beads. He filled a handful with air and let them soak in soap and then air dry, so they stick together. He was very creative in finding new unique ways to make these new toys!
Thankfully, Declan’s teacher also allows him to bring a handful of his fidgets to school to manipulate throughout the school day. His favorites to bring are the ones that gross-out his 1/1 aid. I guess she had a big reaction to the squishy ones that made Declan laugh. They go to school everyday now.
One question still remains: When will the collection be complete? Will it ever be finished? Since he is asking about another item and a new faraway store, I can rest assured, he is not done yet. My fidget-driving days are still a real thing.
Until the next infatuation comes along, I guess. I can only hope the next infatuation is something Declan can do in-house!
You do such an awesome job with these posts! I love it! This part hit home for me, “Which is how I found myself driving an hour away to search another store that MIGHT have the fidgets Declan wanted so badly.” –This is just what we do, it’s in our nature😁. You are doing an amazing job! I can recall a time when my son, who is also autistic, was about five and he decided the only thing he would eat is chocolate yoplait whips. So off I went to all of the groceries stores buying them out. Drove up to an hour away to get enough to last a few weeks. Great post! Thank you for sharing!
Thank you so much!! I hear you about the food. When the pandemic hit it felt like everything Declan ate (and it is a specific list) was sold out. We somehow were able to find all the special food items eventually. But I agree, it’s just what we do!! Thanks again!
You’re welcome! Oh I know! My son has a gluten sensitivity and all of the sudden his stuff was hard to come by for a few months or so. We had to be ever so diligent looking in advance for his gluten free snack cakes. 🤗🙃
You’re such a great mom to Declan. The things you’ll go and places you’ll do for him. That boxed fort looks like a lot of fun and I also seem to recall something about making a Cartoon Cat for him at some point.
It looks like he has a lot of fidgets! 🤣 Hopefully for you it comes to a manageable end soon. Our T also loves to fidget with balloons. I can see how it’s calming and soothing. I’m going to look this up as something to do with him too. So thanks!
Thank you! He’s just learned how to make puppets out of brown lunch bags. All I had to do was supply the bag – hopefully, we are on to something new! 🙂
Awesome! Yeah, they were pretty easy to make. I had to help get the flour and the beads in, but I have to say, they are pretty cool! Declan did the globules like ones making them stick together. I didn’t know though and walked into the bathroom with towels, soap, balloons – wondering, “What the….??” 🙂 But they were cool! Hope T has fun with them too!
I thought I pressed reply so apologies if I’m posting my reply twice (maybe it’s a sign I need to go to bed): But just wanted to say that brown bag puppets sound like a lot of fun! And I look forward to trying the fidget toys with T. 😊
For some reason, your comments just go to my spam. I’m not sure why? But I got you!
Yes, we have puppies now in the form of brown lunch bags. He is pretty clever! And I forgot to tell you that if you fill a balloon with a little bit of water for a water squishy, they are fun and feel like the real thing – but they ALWAYS break. 🙂 Worth the effort but always a little messy. For a while, Declan was putting a little drop of soap in there too to increase the sensory pleasure. Even messier! 🙂
I also love your posts. My son has a serious collection. Have you seen the flying fidget spinner that is rechargeable? Still, nothing beats a balloon. You rock.
I have not heard of the flying fidget spinner. I just asked Declan and he hadn’t either and wanted to look one up. They look cool! Declan said, “Oh, we’re getting that!” 🙂 Thanks for the heads up! I agree, the balloons are the best. So clever to use to make your own!
Reminds me of Eli’s pyrotechnic phase, he’d watch the videos, make a shopping list and then we’d have to drive to a city to buy the stuff. 90 minutes plus $20 usually sufficed. Now we have all these random half bottles of stump remover, septic field cleaner and of course black powder lying around in the garage. I feel Bob’s pain. This winter I’ve gained an edge in biking because I’ve ridden consistently on freezing days. But by April, I’m going to be huffing and puffing again trying to keep up.
Bob has actually avoided playing basketball with Bobby for a long time as he was afraid of losing and didn’t want to lose his feeling of, “I still got it!” It’s happened. He’s lost. He’s doing okay. Just okay. 🙂
I was thinking of your driving too when I was done with this. Angie also gets sent on goose chases sometimes for Ben. There is a focus, and then there is a (possibly long) drive. 🙂
Goose chases seems to be the secret bane of autism parents.
You are such a great mom and I love that he makes some of his own fidgets.
Thank you!! Me too 🙂
It’s great to see your kids excited about something. It reminds me of when I used to get excited about things…
Yes, listening to my son go on and on about linguistics is TORTURE, but on the other level, it is great seeing him so enthusiastic…
Declan has been watching the same fidget YouTube video for the past half an hour. I think I could even recite what the girl is saying about her favorite fidgets. It is tortuous, but definitely not the worst thing he has ever been completely focused on. I agree, I can’t remember ever being so excited about something!
As others are rightly saying. You are a fantastic mum. We went through the fidget stage. Mine were awful.
Thank you! We went though and are back again. All I have to do really is tie balloons. That is probably the best (and only) help I can give! 🙂
He’s obviously too smart for his own good! You’re sweet to drive him everywhere but I would do the same. 🚗
I like his determination and focus – for that, I will drive him anywhere! Well, within reason. 🙂
Oh fidgets! When I was teaching I had a basket of assorted things I would catch on clearance. Different items suited different kids.
Not long ago I crocheted a “hyperbolic mobius crochet toy”. Look up the video. It’s actually kind of cool but my sensory pleasure was in crocheting the unique twists, not in playing with it. If Declan ever discovers a you tube video on that and thinks it’s cool, I’ll mail you mine. I think it’s something a person would either love or hate so, with no testers, I never made more that the one.
I’ll check it out! He has this big bin and every morning before school he chooses three to take to school with him. I know teachers in years past have had a bin at school for him. I am not sure if his teacher has one now or he just prefers his own. But they do help!