What do I Really See?

I vacuum a lot.

I have no shame in admitting I am a bit of a neat freak.  In my quest for order and cleanliness, the floors have always been at the top of my list.

I think I vacuum a lot because I am unable to focus if there is disorder around me.  And the floors take up the largest amount of space – the greatest area for possible disorder.

I have a vacuum on every floor, even the basement.  And yes, I vacuum so much that I must replace a vacuum every year.

It is when I vacuum that thoughts pop up about what I want to write about, or how I want to write a post in general.  Conversation? Information? And if I get stuck on an idea while writing a post, I am off to find my vacuum and take care of another (already cleaned) floor.

I run 1-2 hours a day.  You would think my greatest thoughts would come during this time.  I mean, what else am I doing with my mind?  But they don’t.  I honestly couldn’t tell you what I think about when I run.

It’s not running.  It’s vacuuming.

Yesterday I posted Some Things get Easier.  It was about support provided to my husband and I from another couple with an older son on the autism spectrum.

I thought about that conversation after watching Declan jump on the sofa and when we might replace the furniture.

It was when I was vacuuming last night, and again this morning, that I realized there was a lot more I could say about things getting easier.

I thought back 4 years.  Declan was 2 ½ years old.  Words that he could once speak disappeared.  He never played with toys.  He didn’t sit to watch TV.  He didn’t sit at all.  Always on the go, completely oblivious to danger.  Only sleeping a couple of hours, a night.  Sensory seeking.  Aggressive.  Unable to be around peers as he hurt them.

And me?  Trying my hardest to stay 2 steps ahead of him, keeping him occupied and safe.  Most of time, however, I was 2 steps behind cleaning up so mess with a first aid kit in tow.

We discovered Declan liked music.  He couldn’t speak but could sing the entire Frozen soundtrack.  We gave him a trampoline.  We gave him Melatonin with our Dr.’s guidance.  Services were provided to Declan to help him with his aggression.  To help him socialize with peers.

Four years later I see Declan jumping on the couch listening to his favorite songs as he does every morning.

What do I really see?

Learned coping skills.

Yes, he has a trampoline downstairs and he uses it when he goes down there.  But in the morning, it’s the sofa.  The sofa meets his sensory seeking needs.

He loves music.  We used it to help him with his speech but also as a coping skill, like I talked about in my post Trigger Words.  He can maneuver through his device on his own as well.

He still doesn’t play with toys.  He still is not one to sit.  He still has trouble sleeping through the whole night but is doing better.

Four years ago, I didn’t know what the heck I was doing.  At most I would say I was surviving.

But it is good to look back and see the things we introduced to help him then are the things he is turning to now, on his own, to meet his needs.

That’s amazing!

(P.S. This post was brought to you with 0 extra trips to the vacuum cleaner for guidance)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=orsd3oK8ALs